it just seems like the more i ruminate on "problems" i have with things and situations around me, the less at peace i feel about anything, and the more prone i am to flip out in a venting session to my friends.
it's just freaking annoying that although i constantly think of how i need to spend more time in God's Word and in prayer, the less time i actually do it. i have less time, and more stress. almost exponential stress. it's like moore's law for computers:
"the number of transistors that can be inexpensively placed on an integrated circuit is increasing exponentially, doubling approximately every two years."
i feel like my stress level is increasing faster than that. i want to spend time in God's presence, but even now, i'm not doing that. i'm FREAKING TYPING ON A KEYBOARD!!!
i'm sorry, this is ridiculous. i'm getting off this computer. this is dumb.
i'll feel better in the morning, hopefully.
2 comments:
one thing i've learned about prayer is that I don't like to pray, and people don't like to pray in general. it's hard and it takes time and it's to a very invisible God who speaks but usually in tones that maybe a lucky dog can hear...
i'm going to write a cheesy paragraph so brace yourself: don't feel bad. your not alone out there in the "i want more time with God" boat. He probably put you in the boat in the first place to realize that you are in complete need of Him, and to put hunger and thirst inside of you.
maybe you should go on a bloggie fast to save some timeo...just a thought. good luck on finding the balance friend.
Word...I know how you feel...you know what helped me?....going back to school, I have much more time on my hands! NOT!!
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