improv dreams...if only i could fall asleep

so here i am, at 3am.  i can't seem to fall asleep after spending a little time venting to God.  reason is, i have so many ides running thru my head that i can't get my brain to settle down.  i really want to use my skills and passions for God's glory, but at 3am, it's hard to get your brain around a solid idea for starting some type of improv ministry.

if you'd asked me what i wanted to do just 6 hours ago, i would have said, "find a job that will help me pay off my school bills and allow me to do improv as well."  well, my narrow mind always seems to keep me in the box of springfield, missouri.  after much frustration tonight while talking to God, however, i have finally come to the conclusion that i don't care where i am.

i want to do God's will above all else, and if that means leaving springfield, leaving my volunteer duties at north point, leaving my volunteer (...ahem) duties at the skinny, and leaving my family even more scattered across the country than before, then so be it.

is it crazy to think of starting a ministry at age 22?  maybe it is.  do i even know if this is really where God (and/or all the crazy ideas that float around in my head) is taking me??  i have no idea.

all i know is that i don't want to be stuck here in springfield doing some mundane job that i hate doing, which has no perceivable connection to my passions and skills, and which will just continue to keep me thinking within the limiting box of springfield, mo.  i know that God has bigger things out there for me.

i just don't know where to even look to start.  that is where i am at a complete loss.  i want to impact the world (or at least as large a portion of the world as God gives me influence in), and i know that there is a place for improv and theatre arts in this plan.  but WHERE DO I START?!?!

this, my friends, is the very thing that is keeping me up at 3am.

tomorrow (or today, i suppose), i drive a van full of middle school and high school students to branson for the southern missouri district youth convention.  i am so excited.  pray that God gets a hold on the lives of these students who are going.  and experience with God is the greatest thing we could ask for these students.  pray also that God speaks to me while i'm there.  i know i will be doing that very thing.  and also pray that i get to sleep.

cuz my mind is still reeling with the possibilities and frustrations that these ideas are presenting....at 3am.